Today I mentioned to my mother that I was signing up for some on-line courses, because I was missing some prerequisites I need to enroll for a degree that I'm considering.
She said "if you need help paying we'll be glad to assist."
Why does such an offer make my blood boil? Isn't it nice of my mom to try to help me get back on my feet, to help my try to create a more rewarding life for myself? No because when it counts, when it came to the support I really needed, whether financial or emotional, at critical life junctions both in childhood and adulthood, there was no support forthcoming, only threats.
This offer is a token, a token to say that she treats all her daughters equally. But My mom could pay for my whole degree now and it wouldn't be enough for me.
But maybe, just maybe, could this be her way of saying sorry or is that my little fantasy? Cuz really that's the only only thing I want from them.
Aren't I to old for this shit? I should be past all this anger. It's not like I was beaten and abused like some people I know.