I got to the point where I just hated OTD blogs. I stopped reading them because they made me depressed.
They made me depressed because so many of them seemed to have built successful lives for themselves while I couldn't
The person I hated most was abandoning eden.
My baby's father asked me what a successful life is
A successful life of course is in the eyes of the beholder- actually the one living it. but I think there are a number of common factors involved and that at least a couple of them are required for most people to feel satisfied with their life. . .
They include some of the following, in no particular order.
1-financial growth
2- having found a soulmate and life partner
3- having good close friends
4- playing a leadership role, in any context, even a minor one,
5- successful in a career that they enjoy and find meaningful
6- raising children according to their own values, and having a good relationship with them
7-engaged in creative activity other than career
I think it really only takes a couple of these things. But None of those things applied to me. Some of them are really just a matter of luck, but still fail like a failure even so. .
Of course not all OTD's are like that, in fact MOST of the OTD or quasi OTD friends that I have in person fit into my category- stumbling along at life. Perhaps that is because like is attracted to like. .
So In the next post I'm going to analyze why exactly I have not been able to get my act together.
Some things are my fault, some are my parents and society's fault. We'll see.
3 comments:
wow this one just hit me we are really in the same shoes lol i wish i knew u beforehand jewishfun2@gmail.com
O if only you knew...I don't really blog about the things that I'm unsuccessful at! Like that my husband has been unemployed for 3 and a half out of the last 5 years and basically has no career prospects at all and we are barely scraping by and I am seriously freaking out about how we are going to pay for this baby. Or that I have no social life or friends in the south cause I don't know how to make friends without a jewish community backing me up. Or that I have generalized anxiety disorder and throw up all the time from stress (when I'm not pregnant, I'm hoping all the throwing up now is because of pregnancy). And that I'm not always good at my career...I got terrible teaching evaluations this semester and doubt myself frequently. Also I have other issues that are so bad I'm not even willing to put them into a blog comment...anyway the only "negative" thing I write on my blog is about my experiences with my parents/family, so it's a pretty skewed view of my life...I also feel bad looking at other people's facebook posts and stuff where they seem to have their shit so much more together than me and my family...we are all putting out a weird distorted picture of ourselves on the internet I think.
ha ha ha!!!! That's funny! I guess the grass is always greener on the other side, right? I'm sure some people actually do look at me as living a cool life! They don't know all the self doubt that comes out when I blog anonymously.....
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